May 20th, 1995 - Yankees host the Whore-ioles!

May 20th, 1995 - Yankees vs Baltimore
"Security sucks! They like men!"

A Saturday afternoon at the Stadium. Old Cowbell King Ali showed up in a suit for whatever reason and from whatever gathering, and was putting on quite the bell-ringin' and dance steppin' sort of show. "Hey, Ali, I heard you left your heart in San Francisco!" someone cackled. To the contrary of Ali's dapper self, some slummy guy with a hangdog look sat right in our midst all by his lonesome, causing someone to crack, "he looks like he came from the track and lost all his money."

While all this was going on our good friend George was taking some heat for showing up the game before essentially to exchange pleasantries and gladhand, only to leave during THE SECOND INNING. "Hey, I had things to do" he shrugged on the way.

The esteemable Sherman Obando was in right for Baltimore, and catching heat from our festive selfs in the 80 degree weather. "Hey, Sherman, I heard your boyfriend O-bando's over for you!" I noted the beers were now $5.50, which harkened a call over the fence towards Sherm, "Obando, get me a beer, make yourself useful!" Showing even Creatures have a sense for history there was even a "General Sherman" Obando reference.

Someone must have crashed a car around this time, as the old mantra "all in all its another Porshe in the wall" is scrawled. I thought for a moment it may have been Flyer Pelle Lindbergh, but he was already 10 years dead by this time. And showing our current event bent there were also Dutchess of York Sarah Ferguson toe-licking jokes on here, and a blunt "Sarah Ferguson sucks" note to sum it up. In another discussion, someone snapped "Fuck Scottie Pippen, I hope he dies." We were all over the board on this one, as offensive as ever.

The denizens of the bleachers were their normal canny selves. Even an oldtimer Brooklyn Dodger fan was hassled. The normal "Security Sucks!" chant had an addendum of "They like men!" In the oddball fan category, there was a guy out there wearing an Elvis Costello concert hat. And in the lookalike category there was quite the jolly "Greg Brady"

This one saw TEN mystery outs, and a mystery ERROR! Yes, this means the keeper of the scorecard MISSED all those plays. There was a string of FOUR mystery outs in a row for the Yankees stretching from the 5th into the 6th, and after a strikout from Tartabull, there was another one. Geez...who the Hell knows what was going on.

The Yankees sailed to a comfy 7-2 win behind a 5 run third and a decent 6 innings from Melido Perez. We got to see the legendary Rob McDonald come in for him and hurl an innings plus before Bob Wickman wrapped it up. Pat Kelly went 2-3 and scored twice, as did Bernie. Leyritz, Stanley and Tartabull each drove in a deuce. The Yankees strolled out BW, LF Velarde, 1B Leyritz, C Stanley, DH Tartabull, RF Gerald Williams, SS Fernandez, 3B Russ Davis, and 2B Kelly.

The Orioles punched out an anemic 4 hits, which was duly noted by reference after the first with a "no hitter intact through one" just in case on the card. The Oriole lineup featured Brady "is a Lady" Anderson leading off at CF, LF Kevin Bass, 1B Palmiero, SS Ripken, DH Baines, our old friend Matt Nokes at C, the aforementioned Obando as RF, Jeff Manto at 3B, and Bret Barberie at 2B. After portly starter Sidney Fernandez left after surrendering 5 in 2.1 we saw Keith Oquist and Brad Pennington cap it off. My God, how did the Orioles win a game back then?

Ah, for our profile lets roll with Mr. Obando. Originally signed by the Yankees out of Panama in 1987 he was a strapping 6'4 and 215, he managed 13 pokes and 49 RBIs in 355 MLB at-bats. His tenure stretched here and there from 93-97. He moved on to Montreal after the 95 season in a one for one swap for the inimitable Tony Tarasco. Obando was blessed with NO speed, swiping 3 bags in his time, and he whiffed an awful lot, almost 1 of 3 times at the dish, with a cool 100. Born in 1970, finishing with a .239 average, and having 6,325 hits on baseball-reference.com, how can he not be missed!?

As for the 20th, the Yankees upped the mark to 11-9 (3-2 with me on hand) in front of 25,237, in a game played in 2:55 and called by umpires Tim Welke, Joe Brinkman, Ken Kaiser, and Derryl Cousins.